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Crazy Christmas Capers and Other Sordid Stories

Posted December 17, 2019

Santa in a Grocery CartWe’re at the end of another year, and chances are good that you’ve seen your share of mayhem in 2019. But brace yourself! The holidays can bring out the crazy in all of us, and you may find yourself with some new clients this holiday season.

Just to give you a laugh, here’s a look at some Christmastime crimes committed through the years.

‘Highly’ suspicious packages
No matter how nicely you wrap it, you can’t outwit a drug-sniffing dog. The driver of a BMW SUV filled with wrapped Christmas gifts was pulled over on the Ohio Turnpike for failure to maintain their lane. A canine officer indicated the presence of contraband and Ohio State Highway Patrol troopers searched the vehicle. But they didn’t find toys, clothes and candy – concealed in the “gifts” was 30 pounds of home-grown hydroponic marijuana worth an estimated $192,000.

Something fishy
A man who gave his girlfriend a fillet knife for Christmas was treated at a Seattle hospital for stab wounds the following day. The couple, apparently fishing enthusiasts, offered conflicting stories about the nature of the attack. The woman alleged that the man had threatened to hurt her several times, including on the drive home from their fishing trip. From his hospital bed, the man denied making any threats. “He said he had no idea why she would do it, and he had made no threats to her,” police wrote in a report.

One thing was undisputed: he had an 11-inch gash across his throat that included a cut to his trachea. He also was stabbed in the chest and had cuts to both hands, according to court papers said. At the time of the report, the man was listed in stable condition.

Honey, where did our reindeer go?
Police charged one couple in Colorado for stealing a reported $2,000 in holiday decorations – from other people’s yards. The wife told the local television station that while her front and back yards were filling up with decorations, she didn’t know where they were coming from.

“Every morning he’d go out for a walk, at like 2 or 3 am, and then there was just more stuff in the yard,” she told the station.

The man spent Christmas morning in jail, while the wife bonded out. All the decorations were returned.

Gifts from the heart
One Florida thief faked a heart attack to distract Walmart security guards so his pal could steal Christmas toys, police said. Security video shows the pair loading a Barbie car, a Leap Frog tablet and a Barbie Glam vacation house — worth a combined $369 — into a cart.

The man is seen falling to the ground, near the exit, and clutching his chest. Of course, concerned customers and employees stop to help — with one even appearing to make a 911 call.

Meanwhile, his buddy is seen on surveillance rolling the goods through the door. The man then miraculously stands up, with his hand still pressed on his heart, before slowly exiting the store.

Cops said the pair met up again outside and drove off in the same car.

Have yourself a slithery little Christmas
A Louisiana man was charged with stealing three snakes — and a cash register — from a Louisiana pet store one December.

The pet store owner called police after noticing the back door of the business had been pried open. The owner also noticed the cash register, a $600 Ball Python and two Boa snakes were missing. Police canvassed the area and located a vacant building with a makeshift bed, three snakes and a jail ID card — with the suspect’s name on it — inside.

“Aggressive detective work was not required to determine that the three snakes were the same reptiles missing,” said a local officer. As the thief was jailed for burglary, he stated that he simply stole the snakes as a Christmas present for his son.

This Santa is on the naughty list
Maine State Police say they arrested the driver of a stolen vehicle who identified himself as Santa Claus following a nearly 50-mile chase.

Police said the chase started after they tried to pull the driver over for a traffic violation. The chase then reached a speed of 112 miles per hour before spike strips were deployed about 30 miles away. The “Santa Claus” drove on busted tires for another 15 miles before troopers caught and arrested him.

It wasn’t immediately known if the 54-year-old suspect had a lawyer. A woman who identified herself as his mother said she hadn’t spoken to him and had no comment.

The man was jailed on stolen vehicle and criminal speeding charges.

While we at A 2nd Chance Bail Bonds certainly hope that your holiday season is peaceful, you never know when you need to be prepared for a dose of craziness. If your clients get caught up in holiday mayhem, know that we are here to help 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, including Christmas and New Year’s Eve, at all four of our locations across Metro Atlanta.


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